Weight

Ok, to do this properly I need to weigh myself right? Well after losing 16 lbs on my fast I am scared to get back on the scale. I don't want to see that I have gained it all back. But I guess I don't have a choice if I'm going to track myself. Grrrrrr... ok, I'll do it tomorrow.

DAY 1

I have decided that today my step towards losing weight will be to eat smaller portions. Since I am taking small towards towards my goal I will not change what I am eating today. I will simply eat less of it. I started this morning doing my usual Saturday ritual, going to the Pancake House. I ordered the same thing but I left a lot on the plate this time. A lot more then I usually leave. I ordered pancakes, eggs, turkey bacon and cheese grits. I ate one strip of bacon, most of the pancakes and a little of the grits and eggs. I am very proud of myself. I drank water as always (I love water).

Encouraging Words for Now

This is something I look at when I am not feeling good about my body. When you think about the things your body does for you, or the fact that one day your daughter will have to learn to love her body... wow, how can you not appreciate it for what it is right now in this exact moment. (Click on pic to see larger)

Tools to Help

One thing I have decided to do is to keep a journal of encouraging thoughts, photos, and uplifting articles. I choose photos of models to keep me focused on my goals, magazine tear outs of positive articles to keep me happy in the present, interesting pics and clothing to give me a laugh or inspiration... anything that I think will help me in my journey and keep me from eating the chocolate fudge brownie ice cream. The journal that I keep is a small purse size journal so that I can keep it with me and pull it out whenever I think about it. I like always having it with me as a pick me up. I also keep events and dates in there so I can think about how I want to look at these events. And one pic I won't show you is a pic of me that brought me to tears because I didn't realize I was that big. I keep a copy of that in there so that I won't go back to that.

Everything will be Perfect once I Lose Weight

The lies we tell ourselves.

No it won't, if it isn't perfect now it won't be perfect then. You have to be happy now with what you have, who you are, where you live, your friends, your family, your bank account, your hair, etc. Don't wait for tomorrow or next month or next year. You will look back and regret it. Because you will realize what was really important and the size of you pants it will not be. Don't wait to buy yourself that designer dress. I have been waiting for over 5 years to by my dream wardrobe, because I refuse to spend a lot of money on something that I won't be able to fit in a few months (because of course I will be skinny in 3 months I tell myself each time). Well guess what, if I would've went ahead and bought that stuff I would've gotten great use out of it, looked better in the few pictures I did take, feel better, and by now they would've been out of style so I wouldn't be wearing them anyway. So don't wait people, learn from my mistakes!

Life Happens Epiphany

One thing I have decided to no longer do is to wait until I have an uninterrupted span of time to start or continue my diet. I went through a wedding, a holiday and a graduation dinner during my Daniel Fast and guess what, I made it. If I would've waited for 40 uninterrupted days I would still be waiting.

I am no longer going to give myself the excuse to slack off because of events. My entire month of August is already booked solid. Now am I going to say, oh I'll just wait until I get back from vacation, or I'll just wait until after the family reunion, or I'll get started after I visit my friend for her birthday? No, because I will forever be restarting if I give in to that. Life happens people, and it is a blessing that it is happening. So I will just continue with my plan throughout all of life's wonderful events and make my goal a priority as well.

Daniel Fast

Well the thing that really helped me was doing a fast with my mom. It's called the DANIEL FAST

My mom actually got the information through church and asked me to do it with her. The church tweaked it and decided to do it for 40 days. The food list was the same. And there was a scripture and meditation points for each day. I LOVED it and I felt so good. There were so many wonderful things that came about during that fast. My relationship with God was strengthened, I lost 16 pounds, I had more energy, I had no digestion problems, I got things done on my to do list that had been there for over 2 years, I learned about myself, I learned discipline with food, I felt healthier, I gained wisdom, I was more giving, I found a church home, my husband was baptized, my temp job was a piece of cake, I made it through a wedding and a holiday while on the fast, and I realized how supportive others could be when you give them the benefit of the doubt.

I would suggest this fast for anyone, it is very healthy and not limiting to how much you can eat. I will be doing it again October 1 with my mother and two of my cousins.

When I saw the food list I KNEW I could not do this. I did not want to even try but my mom persisted and I knew I needed it. And it was not easy. I am a sweetaholic and I love whatever is not good for me. I just prayed and believed and went in head first. And now I can't believe I'm saying this but I'm actually looking forward to doing it again.

What is my Goal?

I want to lose 55 p0unds

Right now I am 29 years old, 5'6", and 188 lbs

Reasons: 1. Healthier, for my height and weight I am knocking on OBESITY by our standards

http://www.aarp.org

This is NOT ok, with diabetes running rampant around me I really need to get serious.

I will be 30 next month and I am ready for a change. I am ready to actually say I am proud of my body. I have never said that before, even when I look back at old pictures and see how skinny I was I never felt as though I was. So that is the main reason I am deciding to be happy now. Whenever I speak to people about this it's the same response. They always didn't appreciate how skinny they were when they were actually that size. We judge ourselves so harshly in the present. When I look back at pictures that I thought I looked ugly, shinny, cheesy, and chubby in I don't see that anymore. It's like when you look back you just remember the memories and see yourself differently. I'm challenging myself to see me in that light in the present. Instead of criticizing myself I am going to uplift myself.

Some things this blog will entail

I am going to use this blog to hold myself accountable for doing something everyday that gets me closer to my goal. So I have 365 days to get it together. I have never given myself this amount of time to get in shape. I always want a quick fix. And by quick I don't mean a week or two. But between 3 weeks and 3 months is my usual time. I usually feel that I just can't wait any longer but when I look back YEARS have passed. So if I wasn't focused on doing it fast and furious I probably could've been my perfect size by now.

I will let the world know my progress, my setbacks, and my plans.

I will talk about what I eat, when I eat and where I eat.

I will also include my workouts. The plans, the actual follow through, the results.

And because I am who I am there will most likely be other random things that I post that are interesting to me that have absolutely nothing to do with weight loss :-)

Be Happy... NOW

I have also decided to be happy with who I am now instead of waiting for the weight to come off to be happy, to wear the cute clothes, to express myself in my wardrobe, to go swimming, to take pictures, to treat myself, etc.

Why do we always decide that we need to wait in order to do _________?

No forget that, I'm not waiting anymore, I'm going to enjoy the journey that is my life. As the saying goes, "Yesterday is history, tomorrow's a mystery, but today is a gift and that is why it's called the present." So are you going to be thankful for your present or are you going to set it aside until you fit into a size 6?

It's a Marathon, Not a Sprint

So the biggest epiphany I've had was that I have to stop thinking I can lose this weight in a month, 2 months or three months. I have relegated myself to the fact that it is going to be a journey and I'm ok with that.

Follow Me For A Year

I need to be held accountable! So I am giving myself a year to lose this weight once and for all.